• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to footer
  • Home
  • Reviews
  • Stories
    • How to start your Blog
    • #blacklivesmatter / educate yourself with literature
    • How to be a Designer – Interview with Anna Nunez
    • Corona Times – Free E-Books and Activities at home
    • Haters gonna Hate – when Bookstagram becomes hell
  • Sustainable and Fair
    • Big Fair Fashion Guide
    • Ethical & Sustainable Beach Wear
    • Minimalism
    • Beat the Summer Heat- Sustainable Summer Tips & Tricks
    • “Say no to plastic” – my zero waste guide
  • Vegan Recipes
  • Travel
    • I am going to Berlin :)
    • Discovering Lisbon – sustainable and vegan
  • Shop
  • About Me
    • Work with Me

Solaires Stories

Haters gonna Hate – when Bookstagram becomes hell

30. March 2019Stories1

Hello my dears,

so first I want to say – don’t get the title of this blogpost wrong. For me Bookstagram is the most generous, kind and uplifting community I know and it is half of my life! BUT I’ve witnessed, that it’s not so easy for all of us. And so I thought I might address this topic and kill it with kindness – or in my case – irony and sarcasm. So don’t feel offended if it gets a bit too salty, but I have stuff to say.

Sometimes the sentence “If you don’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all” should be more prominent. Especially when people are talking about other peoples hobbies or love interests, genre likings or art.

Bookstagram and our blogger should be a safe haven, a space of freedom and happiness. This week I wrote a blogpost and the first reaction I got was a mere negative comment. As a smaller blogger who barely gets comments or any recognition at all, it hurts to see a comment that tears you and your opinion down. Or a comment that reminds you, that you have no idea what you are talking about. I never understood why people would do that to others. My motto is “spread love and gain love.” because that’s how it functions.

Young Adult/ New Adult what is this new hell?

That is a thing I’ve seen quiet often in bookstagram. People telling other people that they are talking crap and don’t have any idea what they are talking about. Weeeeeellll.

The person who can tell apart all the books in their matching genre is my personal hero and shall get an award, because I can not. Young Adult, New Adult, children Fiction, Romance, Bromance – well you get what I mean. It can get confusing and who are we to bash people who don’t know that “the hunger games” is a young adult book. Or is it a dystopian novel? Science fiction? I am giving up.

For me most books fit into different genres at the same time – and should we really argue about that, instead of hating on Tamlin or this crazy bitch that robs our love interest from the main character? There a greater things at stake! In most books the world is ending, weddings are crashed and high schools are full of demons, so why should we bother to argue about the genre, instead of diving back into these worlds? As on most topics in my opinion people should reconsider what really matters – and what is only semantics.

bookstagram

Romance/ Erotic books

Oh this wee topic that drives me crazy on a daily base. I just want to counteract to some stuff I heard about this, that made me angry and roll my eyes, so that they nearly got stuck in the inside of my apparently traumatized head.

“Romance/ Erotik books are like pornos in bookish form.”

Oh dear. Even if they are – whats the problem? First sex sells. And I see this on a daily base. Mostly with half naked women in the main role. A women in lingerie laughing her ass off because of this great new toothpaste. Funny story indeed. Or half naked women presenting cars on an exhibition – wait what, I thought women have to stand in the kitchen and cook, because we don’t have any clue regarding cars? Yep the world is a hypocrite. We may present the things we don’t even have a plan about, but we are the nicest accessories they get so why not. Irony off.

We have many many problems in this world, but young women reading about great and extraordinary sex is none of them. They deserve this! It has so many benefits (learning what they want, what they like, whom they like!) and in my opinion doesn’t even fit in this tiny dirty hole lots of people want to press them in. For centuries men have sexualized the women’s body and being and no one screams “you dirty little sucker” – so why do we do this to each other? Why should a man tell us what we should read? Right. We aren’t stuck in the 17th century and will never be again. So young ladies: read “porno” books, watch pornos, swoon over hot sexualized males – because this won’t doom the whole worlds being.

“They give men/women the wrong impression how sex should be/ how someone should look like.”

Thats another “oh dear” from me. Do I hear this even from the back rows? Yep! I don’t even know how people can’t loose their mind hearing such things. Girl/ boy are you watching tv? Movies? Netflix? Anything at all with your eyes? You do? Then you are a hypocrite. We all have crushes. Men on men, women on men, women on women, men on women. (and yes I know that is a bit to easy explained, but you get what I mean)

Because that is pretty normal! I have a huge crush for Gal Gadot, and I am not even near being homo- or bisexual. Do I now think I like girls? Nope. Do I think now my boyfriend should wear a Wonder Woman costume and rescue the world? Hell no! All human being are beautiful, but that doesn’t mean we should neglect the picture of full abs, long hair and sensual lips – because it’s only that: a picture in our heads.

But if you really think a book can be your rival then let me tell you as a very confident women: you are doing something wrong. My Boyfriend could watch 50 pornos a day and I wouldn’t think any less of myself or my capabilities. And he doesn’t feel less sexy or stuff only because I am wooing over Aquaman and his badass muscles and tattoos (he is the hottest right? – that’s no illusion of mine!)

If you really think a book can change how people will see you or if they want to be with you – than there is whole world of others problems in your life, but probably not the book. I don’t mean this in a mean way, but if you really think people wouldn’t or couldn’t like you because you don’t have badass abs or don’t have double D, then you should probably learn to love yourself first – because someone in this world will do then too – I promise. ( and don’t come at me with the length of his wingspan discussion – you have to learn some humor first to discuss this with me :D)

bookstagram

The Bookshelve Disaster

You all remember this big article I ranted about?

the hate you give – community hate speeches and my reaction to it

How can we crazy bookstagrammers be able to turn around all our spines and call it a day? Why are we insane and order our books by color, genre, name etc.?

There are really people who want to argue about this kind of question and I am lost in silence when I witness this. Don’t we have other problems? Some people like to live colorful, with candles, bookmarks and fairy lights in their shelves and only because it would drive me crazy from the inside that doesn’t mean that there is something wrong with it. Live and to let live should hang in some homes in big capitals!

I mean for me books aren’t only decidable things – I really read them Vulture Magazine (watch me!), but after and before Ive read them they have to be stacked anywhere, and why, asking for a perfectionist, shouldn’t I make them look nice while they do stand around like beggars? This is really nothing I like to discuss with people. because I also doing discuss why they chose the red couch or the white tablecloth. Because it is not my concern!

Picture Picker

This one is a big big NO! It happened to several ones of my friends and its the worst. People sometimes think they can copy fame and followers when they take other peoples pictures, post them on their own account without tagging these people and acting like they own these pictures. These people are thieves in my opinion and there is no situation in this world where this would be fine.

Imagine, this would happen to you. Like someone taking your art project, giving it to the teacher in an exam and telling the teacher its their own. Than they get an A and never mention it again. Or someone asking if they can read the book you are writing and then selling it to a publisher under their name. Taking away other peoples Photography is just the same and no one likes picture picker.

Get famous because you are wonderful, not because you are envious about others peoples creativity and follower count.

the end of hell

Okay I think you can see where I am coming from here. People get bashed because they disliked a book others loved. They get bashed when they don’t read diverse books OR when they want more diverse books. They feel superior to YA readers when they only read classics – or the other way around. People feel superior because they only read LGBTQ and other diverse books and hate on every fair skinned, blonde haired character they can find. Where does this come from?

Okay I am a full heart feminist, a migrants child (with blond hair by the way) who fights for equality and fairness all the time. BUT when I read I only read. Its just a story. Some mean more to me, some not. In my opinion authors can only write about the things they know, so why should a western author from Austria write a book about “black lives matter” in America? I hope that you all know I don’t meant that in a terrible way, but we can’t all tell the same stories, that’s why reading and writing is so great!

the very end

So what I want to say with this looooong (I know…) blogpost is: we all need more acceptance for ourselves and others. WE are a community, WE are bookstagram and WE ARE ONE. So if you ever were a victim of said things: I apologize for these people, they didn’t knew better. If you were a bokkstagram traitor that behaved in a judging way please think about how you want to be treated and treat others better than that 🙂 Believe me: give love and get love is a thing and makes daily life loooooots better!

I wish you all great stories and even better friends

kisses

signature Ariana
1

Related

Previous Post: « Book Journal
Next Post: Ava Reed Special »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Anabelle

    9. May 2019 at 20:23

    Hey dear girl,

    I cannot believe it took me so long to finally read your article – I’m so sorry.
    I am honestly surprised this age-long fight of magazines and newspapers against bookstagrammers is still going on. As your whole blogpost says: Let’s not focus on the hate, but rather the positive. Still, it’s incredible to me how some people can’t get into their heads that people might enjoy taking pretty pictures AND read a book. Like lighting colourful candles WHILE turning pages and consuming words.

    I am slightly disagreeing on the body image part, because I think porn (not just the bookish version, but the actual visual one) do portray a distorted image. Not just of our bodies, but also actions and pleasure in itself and is supporting sexist stereotypes and roles in a myriad of ways. But that’s another topic that could fill whole books. 🙂

    Thanks for speaking out and spreading positivity!

    Anabelle

    Reply
    • Solaire

      9. May 2019 at 20:38

      Hey my love 😊

      I am just happy that you found the time to read it!

      And yes you are probably right! It’s a really small path between reality and imaginative reality! I often find myself that something should be more like in the books I am reading and that’s probably very wrong! But in my opinion exactly like you said not only bookish related but all media’s!

      Kisses
      Ariana

      Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Footer

The Blog

  • Datenschutz
  • Impressum
  • Work with Me
  • About Me

Hello & Welcome

I am Solaire (Ariana in the Muggle World), Designer, Bookworm and Storyteller.
If you are searching for an enchanting world, then look around here and fall with me into a fairytale never seen before. I tell tales about traveling, stories and secrets. Do you want to join my court?

Follow Me

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter
  • Gods morning booksters ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Which books made you happy lately?⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ For it definetly was “someone to stay” by @laurakneidl⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ . I just knew that I would love Lucien to bits - and guess what? I was right! Growing up in a mixed family I also understood Alizas struggles very much (never mind the stress situation, that is my life too) I binged the book in one sitting and always had to look back into the illustrations by @gabriella.bujdoso which were just stunning!⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Now I started “the name of the wind” because of @anabellestehl together with my dear
  • Good morning sunshines ☀️ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Real Talk: ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Do you believe in true love?⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I always did. Even though I think I never met her, I believe in her. People always tend to say that I am just a dreamer with my head in stories that aren’t true for a reason. Because the kind of romantic and love that I believe in doesn’t exist. Maybe it doesn’t. Maybe not the cringe too sweet lovestory. But I believe in the love between a queen and a stableboy, between a monster and a warrior. Between everyone who is able to
  • Good morning boys and girls ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Are you tracking the movies and series you watch? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ As I am currently setting up my reading journal for the whole year. Including my the and wishlist and ALL the releases i thought maybe I should track the movies and series I watch too - just to get a hang of what I have already seen! Then I saw this app „Letterboxd“ in @thebibliotheques story and just had to try it out we will see how it goes - but I want to get more organized and this could be a
  • Good morning lovelies . Are you currently getting back into routines you had before corona? . I try to be kinder to myself again. That means not only working my ass off, but also doing some yoga, cooking more healthy and writing my friends more often that I love them. Since I am in home office I tended to isolate myself and even stopped writing the persons I couldn’t see anymore. It was a huge low for me but currently I feel more energetic again and want to do my body and mind something good! That’s why I started working
  • Good morning lovelies ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ How are you feeling today? Did something good happen these past days? ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Today I am just proud of everyone who managed to stand up from bed and just keep going I need to spread more love and positive vibes and I really what this account to be a safe space for all of you to message me with your sorrows and thoughts ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Today I will be reading, maybe illustrating some, showering, cooking and if I have the nerve I’ll record some reels for you all ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ .⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ What kind of reels
  • Good morning my peonies . How many books have you read last year, and what do you plan this year? . But no pressure! This question is not meant to pressure you to tell me a high number. Even if you read only one book in a year like 2020 that’s amazing because it has lead you to a different world than ours is at the moment I read a lot, because I needed to flee all the bad news - and let’s be honest: 2021 hasn’t started less crazy than 2020 I guess we are in for some surprises
Copyright © 2021 ⸱ Solaires Stories ⸱ Design by Love Riot ♡

Log in